Midweek Faith Lift
November 6, 2024
Praying With Others
Rev. Deb Hill-Davis
Spiritual Passages
October 25, 2024
The Power of Optimism
'A conviction that wholeness is back of everything'
A new study finds men and women with the highest levels of optimism had an 11- to-15 percent longer life span on average than those who practiced little positive thinking. “Optimism is one important psychological dimension that has emerged as showing some really interesting associations with health,” said neuroscientist Richard Davidson. “I would add the positive practices of mindfulness, compassion, kindness, and having a strong sense of purpose can contribute to positive health benefits.” Studies of twins finds only about 25% of our optimism is programmed by our genes. The rest is up to us, says Davidson, and how we respond to life’s lemons.
How does that look in real time? Listen to this one:
As I was driving through my neighborhood one day, I stopped to watch a Little League baseball game that was being played in a park near my home. As I sat down behind the bench on the first-baseline, I asked one of the boys what the score was. "We're behind 14 to nothing," he said with a smile. "Really," I said. "I have to say you don't look very discouraged." "Discouraged?" the boy said with a puzzled look on his face. "Why should we be discouraged? We haven't been up to bat yet."
And finally, from Jane Goodall, The Book of Hope:
"The joke about the difference between an optimist and a pessimist: The optimist thinks that this is the best of all possible worlds, and the pessimist fears the optimist is right."
The concept of optimist v pessimist and praying with others seemed to intersect very well, especially as we pause and reflect on this Sunday before the election! Because whatever our beliefs, whatever our strongly held convictions, after this election, we will still have the need to learn how to live with each other, how to heal the wounds of our collective consciousness and find a way to be together as a community, as a nation. Prayer can be part of this process. To pray with others calls for us to cultivate a particularly sensitive mindfulness that supports us in our realization of consciousness and meets the one with whom we pray in the space of their realization of consciousness. It is a challenging needle to thread and requires considerable self-awareness. It requires us to listen skillfully to their need and the pain behind that need.
How might that look? The first thing that jumped out in this chapter about praying with others was Rev. Linda’s statement “No We-ing!” When we pray with others that prayer is happening within our own consciousness and we cannot speak to where anyone else is with true authority.
We may think we know, but we cannot actually know. That is a judgment we are called to put aside if we are to effectively pray with someone. All we can do is speak from our own authority. She says this on p. 128 of Discover Your Divinity:
As we speak from the “I,” we allow them to have their own interior experience of transformation, one that is not dictated or decided by us. We allow them autonomy and do not presume to co-opt their consciousness.
That is an important statement the impacts what we say and how we show up. This becomes then, a language of invitation and holding space, not one of creating a shared space that presumes the person with whom you pray is ready for that space, even as they may want to be there. The invitation may sound more like this: The invitation in this moment is to open our hearts and minds. I breathe and I invite a shifting of attention to the possibility of a new understanding. (p. 130).
The intention of prayer is to create and hold space for the possibility of even greater discovery and understanding of your true divine nature. When you pray with others, you are holding that space first for yourself and then, by invitation, for the person with whom you pray. The journey of discovery is theirs to take and understand, just as your journey is unique to you. The intention is to meet the person where they are, and then hold the space for greater awareness and spiritual possibility. We speak from spiritual authority, not our human experience of authority. Ultimately, from this stance of spiritual authority, we meet our friend where they are and we hold a consciousness of empowerment for them to make a shift in consciousness. We meet them where they are, but in prayer, we don’t leave them there.
How does it sound when we do that? First we remember that the “purpose of affirmative prayer is a shift in consciousness leading to empowerment.” So in the prayer process, we speak words of spiritual truth, words that go beyond the limits of their story, the story of their present human dilemma. That means we don’t get caught up in the story; we have empathy, not sympathy; we feel with the person without taking on their pain because it is not ours to carry. Our greatest gift in prayer support is that we see their story with “spiritual eyes that see the truth of their divinity.” These are statements of spiritual truth that go beyond the “facts” to the level of spiritual truth that is the ultimate truth.
How do we understand this? In his Oct. 21, 2024 blog, Fr. Richard Rohr shares the following from his book The Universal Christ: “If we can trust and listen to our inner divine image, our whole-making instinct, or our True Self, we will act from our best, largest, kindest, most inclusive self.” When we are praying with another, the most important energy of that prayer is to listen to our own higher self, our “whole-making instinct.” When the words of prayer are truly flowing from that inner place of the Divine, it is because our ego is out of the way and we have let go of any attachment to the outcome of our prayer. As Rev. Linda notes, this only happens as a result of your own spiritual practices and prayer consciousness, not because you want it to or will it to happen.
Richard Rohr says it this way in his Oct. 21, 2024 blog, “A Loving Voice”
I would even say that anything said with too much bravado, over-assurance, or with any need to control or impress another, is never the voice of God within us. If any thought feels too harsh, shaming, or diminishing of ourselves or others, it is not likely the voice of God. Trust me on that. That is simply our egoic voice. ……If something comes toward us with grace and can pass through us and toward others with grace, we can trust it as the voice of God.
We do hear the voice of God, the guidance of Spirit in all kinds of ways, expected and unexpected. It is the energy behind the words and the love and grace that they hold that truly matters. That is what made the words of prayer from Jesus so powerful, the words of the Dali Lama such that people listen. There is no ego, just love flowing forth in these holy words.
A word of caution here about the Unity teaching that is the “Law of Mind Action,” that is sometimes simply stated, “thoughts held in mind produce after their kind.” While there is truth to this, as stated it is more of a statement of psychological truth than spiritual truth and it can invite the danger of the spiritual by-pass whereby one tries to avoid any engagement with that which is negative, unpleasant or challenging. As we have noted many times, prayer is not intended to control circumstances or outcomes. Our strongest prayer energy directs us to align with our higher self, with Divine principle. That is when as Fr. Richard notes, the egoic voice moves aside and the energy of Spirit is heard. That is possible when we pray with another, but it is not the goal or object of prayer.
So as we navigate this election season and beyond to envision a place of healing and the wholeness that is “back of everything” that results in better mental health, compassion and kindness which gives us a sense of purpose, what do we remember about prayer and relationship that is at the core of this possible transformation? Philosopher Hanna Arendt states it this way in the October 29, 2024 Richard Rohr blog “Change Through Relationship”: She writes:
The only way we will birth a multiracial democracy is if we hold up a vision of a future that leaves no one behind, not even our worst opponents….. I invite people to take their wounds [and] their opponents’ wounds into spaces of re-imagination—of imagining an outcome, a policy, a relationship that leaves no one outside of our circle of care, not even “them.” This kind of labor, this kind of revolutionary love, it’s not the sacrifice of an individual, it’s a practice of a community.
When we invite people to practice revolutionary love, we always ask, “What is your role in this season of your life?”.... Whatever you choose, it can be a vital practice of love, of revolutionary love. And if all of us are playing our role—not more, not less—then together we’re creating the culture shift that we so desperately need.
Whatever the season of your life, the power of prayer, individually and with another is the power to shift consciousness and thereby invite true transformation of one’s self and the world. May it be so…..
Blessings on the Path,
Rev. Deb